16 Mar 2017
March 16, 2017

Wedding Officiant Relationship Advice

I wanted to start by saying that this post has nothing to do with wedding Officiant dating but instead has to do with the relationship the Officiant has with the bride and/or groom who asked them to perform their wedding ceremony.  In previous blog posts I have stressed the importance of creating a ceremony that reflects the couple by making sure the readings, optional components, opening and closing words, etc. fit the couple and how they see marriage and relationships.   So, if you are a friend or family member who has said yes to officiating a wedding ceremony and you are also writing the ceremony, I wanted to give you another blunt yet gentle Asked to Officiate piece of advice that the wedding ceremony is about the couple and their relationship and thus correspondingly, it is not about you or your relationship with the couple.

Now don’t get me wrong, I understand that you have a history with the couple and although it is quite OK to add a sentence or two into the ceremony explaining why you are standing up there, how honored you are, and how much the couple means to you…the how you know them story should not change the tone or focus of the ceremony, it shouldn’t be too long, and of course it should not embarrass the couple.  If you are going to include something, I recommend you include it in your opening words explaining the why you are marrying them, and how honored you are, and then maybe include a cute or heart-warming story about you and the bride, or groom, or couple somewhere in the personal stories part of the ceremony.   A great rule of thumb is that what you are adding in regards to your relationship with the couple should be a perfect addition to the ceremony and not the focus of the ceremony.

For more information on writing a wedding ceremony, and making it personal, check out our Asked to Officiate ceremony creation workbook…a must for first time Officiants!

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