15 Nov 2016
November 15, 2016

Getting Personal but Not Too Personal in the Wedding Ceremony

A wedding ceremony should very much represent and fit the couple getting married, and thus it follows that the ceremony should be personal. It is our belief that the wording used in the ceremony should let the guests know how the couple views their relationship, their reasons for getting married, and how they feel about each other. It is also our belief that part of the personalization of the ceremony comes from sharing a bit of the couple’s relationship story.

To do the personal stories part, we actually ask our couples 15 questions about their relationship – by sending them separate questionnaires. Those questions include some of the more expected questions such as, “how did you get engaged?” to more personal questions such as, “when did you know _____________ was the right person for you?” We then weave parts of the answers to those questions into the ceremony to share some of the facts, and more importantly, some of the emotion that make up the couple’s story. We will use both mushier moments and light-hearted moments, however, we will never share anything that would truly embarrasses the couple and neither should you. For example, I just heard of an Officiant (an uncle of the bride) who shared the fact that the bride was in Alcoholics Anonymous. Not sure what part of anonymous he didn’t understand, but clearly, even if everyone might have already known, it is not something that should be shared during a wedding ceremony. Similarly, just because you find it awesome that the couple’s relationship started with what they thought would be a one-night stand, it is not something everyone would find so awesome.

We recommend you use what we refer to as the average grandma filter… if it is something the average grandma would be embarrassed to hear, don’t say it. Or in simpler terms, when in doubt, just don’t.

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